my arms sore
from the scars left behind
of the pain i’ve overcome
i feel it rising again
i thought it was over
but i cant control myself
im someone i never knew
and i just want it more
its taken over me again
that addiction
the guilt and pleasure
i hate life, yet i love you
im one big contridiction
i detest myself
i hate myself for doing what i do
yet i enjoy the horrid pleasures
the relief is something i need
you should understand
you’ve overcame
the same addiction as i have
its in the past for you
i want to be able to laugh
again, but the next minute im crying
cant you see me there trying
not to let you see the true me
i hide behind
my addiction