Waiting in line…

Poetic

Lying to myself i say
“i’ll try yo live, just one more day”
as the rain falls in sheets outside
the blade and the pale skin of my wrist collide

trying not to cry
i pull the blade away
i look down at scratches barely deep enough to bleed
and i think to myself…

this should be easy for me
to guide the knife across my wrist,
send myself to eternal bliss
but i can’t do it

it’s just not fair
i want to bleed
i want to see it flow from me
and with it my problems and regrets will leave
memories of you would fade
and i would finally be happy, thanks to a blade
but like life death is cruel and you must wait your turn