She saw pity in my eyes and sneered, she wanted nothing of the sort, she made that quie clear. But I couldn’t help it, there was an eerie sadness to her that I couldn’t put my finger on, and it depressed me, that someone could be in such immense pain.
She was so strong, though I heard her wimpers at night, she didn’t hold anything back when she was alone. I must say, I’m surprised she’s still alive, I would have left ages ago, but i’m weak, very weak.
When we had free time, to do as we pleased, I saw her drawing and writing, outside under a tree in the back of the courtyard, her cigarette quickly fading at the rate at which she inhaled. How sad it was, she drew pictures of death, blood, hatred, vampires. I spoke quietly not directly at her, but she knew it was intended for her, “Life doesn’t make sense,” At that remark her head shot up and there was a hint of fright, sadness, and anger, “You don’t know anything about nothing maing sense, especially life” she snapped, “I am here, aren’t I? I must know something about it” I retorted. “You may have had more recent pain than I, and live your life in sorrow, fearing every second you have to breath becuse you won’t be breathing in the scent you want, no, I don’t know how it feels, I’ve never been down that road, I haven’t had any sadness or misery, I’m here because I like it” I said forcefully, she looked at me with such interest and pain, recollecting her past, “you don’t know anything that happened with me, you never will, I just can’t wait to get out of this fuckin’ white hellhole, where only satan’s tears are heard.” she started to break down, the sun reflected off her watery pools of grey, and she began to cry.
that moment connected us, forever would we hold that memory, we had found each other in our pain and hatred. Livid with fright, she sprinted to the nearest door and ran to her room, I had seen the princess break down. Late that night, in my room I sat there carving my arm with a bloody razor, cecelia walked solumnly into the threshold, she jumped at the site of my blood dripping from the bed’s adge on the cold hard floor. “Hello, have you come to bout out another rant about me not having any pain?” i said stiffly, she wispered slowly, “No, i’m sorry, I just don’t know how to care anymore.” I felt the sadness return to me, what was I to do with this asylum princess? This great mystery? i knew I didn’t have much time, her clock was ticking, she wasn’t going to keep herself here much longer…
____________________________________
I would finish this now but i’m real tired soo….i’ll finish this in the 3rd slection of this….enjoy…B*R
wow…
-tessa