Dear Daddy,
I’m 14 now…turning 15 soon…doubt you would even recognize me I’ve changed so much. I miss you Dad, even after all the shit you did. I still cry at night and pray to anyone thats up there and listening that you’ll come back and be sorry, really sorry this time. I’m so mad at you but it’s not fair for you to fucking abandon me like this! What the hell is wrong with you?
Do you not care that you’ve completely twisted and mutated my life beyond reprieve? Do you know people put stickers on my bike calling me “Freak” or “Wierdo”? Does it not break your heart to know that even after all this…after everything you did to me I still love you? You must be deaf and blind or just plain stupid.
Dad I don’t hate you…I hate what you did. I wanna know so bad how you go through your day without beating yourself up inside. Do you even miss me? I don’t know how you sleep at night knowing I’m out there and you choose not to talk to me or see me. You were always my hero, my superman, and you discarded me like I was just some innocent bystander instead of an active participant. I’m not ok and I’ll never be ok.
It’s almost been a year since I last saw you. I was glaring at you and hating you, I’m still angry. Then you broke down crying and gave me a huge hug and told me you loved me no matter what and you’d never leave me. You fucking abandoned me 2 months after that you spineless bastard. Things got rough so you fucking turned your tail and ran as far as you could.
I miss you though Daddy…I can’t sleep…I haven’t eaten in 3 days…You’re the only one I’ve ever loved and you left me…I’m writing you Dad not to tell you I hate you but to tell you I miss you and I still need you and I still love you with all my heart. I hate you for everthing you did and for all the nights I cried, a broken little heap of human on my bedroom floor and you kicked me until the blood burst forth from my lips and stained my cheeks and hair…it’s still red Dad. I’m still alive somewhat…But my memories are fading…I can’t see your face anymore…You’re just that menacing figure in the dark.
Please come home Dad, I love you…
Your Faithful Daughter…
Brittany known to the world as Raven
Come Home