Pull me up.
Get me back on the boat.
I’m struggling to keep my head
Above the water,
And I don’t know how to swim.
I’m drowning in my own tears.
Please make me stop crying.
The problem is,
I don’t know what I’m crying about.
Let me work more.
45 hours a week will do.
Full class schedule, at least 5 or more.
An hour drive everyday.
Give me activities to fill up the remaining
Hours of my week(ness).
I’ll do extra chores,
Just don’t make me deal with the problem.
Let’s go to a movie,
But no silence please.
My mind will wander
And I don’t like where it goes.
I’ll go to sleep,
But only with pills
Or beer.
I think too much when I lay down to sleep.
And I don’t like what I ponder.
Yes, I know I have too much stress.
Yes I know I have anxiety problems.
Lady, you’ve only scratched the surface.
I know I’m a fucked up person.
But I don’t know why.
Tell me to back off.
To let my body rest.
It can’t handle the strain.
But you don’t realize
My mind can’t handle
The pain.
I don’t want to die.
I want to get better.
I don’t know how,
But I’ll try.
As long as I don’t have to think.