Fuck it all!

I’m mad, I’m angry. It’s 3:46 and I can’t fucking sleep. Why?? Because that bastard child-molester is in my head.

I haven’t had a moments peace where I don’t ponder and he shows up. I get all these homicidal thoughts and wish death and such. He kissed the blade before he thrust the knife into my back. I feel betrayed, sick, angry, vengeful, heartbroken, raped–EVERYTHING! Months ago I would have gladly crept into the dark crevices of my mind. But instead I’m left to stink and drown in his cold-hearted deciet. I hate men. I hate the men that fuck you over and brush you off in persuit of the next woman. I hate the men that make you feel like your life finally matters and then shatter it and act like they didn’t cause it. I hate the men that breathe promises down your throat and bleed you with betrayal. I hate them. I hate you David. I hate Rebecca, Angie, Sarah, Shannon, and Tanya. All these woman you fucked and left me behind to rot in their shadows. Everything about me was a comparison to them. Your ego is the reason you are over weight. I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU!!!!

By RoseTears

I am sleeping in a pool of blood Don't act like you don't kill me with your words Writing, sleeping, dreaming, singing, ...just ask.


  1. wow. very hateful, and painful.

    best wishes to you


  2. if only it were possible to remove people like that from existence. i have three, Evan, Andrew and Christopher. Sometimes it feels like kill time.

  3. I have two. Stuart and Ben. Evil bastards, both of them.
    Never wanted to kill them. Personally I figure keep them alive while removing their nails, and every single body hair one by one.
    Of course, I never will. I can’t and I wouldn’t. But every once in a while it feels good to let it out in some way doesn’t it?

    Borrow my mantra, “Keep it together, keep it together. “::B::

  4. You have obvious reasons to hate him. But you’ve proven who you really hate. That you were so weak enough and so naive to believe…

    Kill him. And if not kill, greatly hurt. You must teach a lesson to these people. They can’t do these things, and expect that nothing will happen to them.

    Still stupid though… isn’t that what you just hate?… … that you were just so stupid, weak and naive… … to just be put into a catigory like so many other stupid girls?… … you’re just another one of them… … It really kills you… You need to kill him…

    There is no real point in tearing off someones nails and hair… … that’s just sick… That’s torture…

    Life’s a gift… who choose to life that gift, without regards to others… he does not deserve that gift, and should die.

    Execute him. It’s all about execution, teaching the wrong and the bad, they can’t do what they do, without consequences. Teach him a lesson…

  5. Wait, child-molester?… how old is he, and how old are you? If you can prove it, that he has done something to you, bring him to court!

    BUT! If you can’t prove it, I mean really prove it. (He can just call you a liar, and say you have some sick thing for him). Then don’t bother. THAN you should kill him, so you don’t accuse him of that, THEN kill him. Because it will be easily directed towards you with a motive like that. Also, you should wait a while before you kill him. A few months is good… Let the past tide clear people of your two connections…

  6. I got to point out for the sake of my soul that I wouldn’t do those things I mentioned, the torture and that. I said I never would. But it’s the urge that’s the important thing. The urge to make someone pay for hurting you or stealing a bit of your life. That’s the same urge that makes you want to kill, no matter how you disguise it.

    You people are seriously murder-happy.
    I’m sorry I figure nobody should get a choice to give and take life like that.
    Don’t get me wrong … I know what it’s like when someone steals your childhood or your innocence or your self respect, or even your life.

    I still think that should be your very last last last option. If you can’t get the guy prosecuted and you can’t move on without the closure …

    There’s one thing I do want to warn all you guys about. I’ve worked with alot of people who’ve done similar things. A life for a life, and all that. And alot of them have fallen apart.
    People think that killing someone you hate enough will be easy. It’s not, I’ve met people who never got over it, and were never able to move on because of the permanent bloodstain on everything they do.
    If you people take this advice and start with the killing spree … just make sure you’ll be able to live with it for the rest of your life.

    After all, I wouldn’t want you to waste any more of your life with the pain and regret.

  7. i feel very sorry for you….
    i agree with nightmaren that you should punish him. but the greatest pain is dealt inside. physical pain is temporary and death is just a little bit too much i think.
    but if you can, in one way or another, punish him mentally, in the head, then you really got him. it hurts so much more. i can tell

    with respect

  8. To Nightmaren, yes, I have thought of these things. I’m angry that he treated me this way, that I was stupid and dumb enough to let him continue to do it–for 2 years. The child-molester part was anger. The first time we had sex I was 17 and he was 23(he turned 24 last month). No, I can’t do anything to him yet, because he’s told his stupid friends about me. He and his best buddy are both getting ready to graduate law school. And if anything ever did happen to him, yes, the blame would point its finger at me. I have since moved about an hour and 45 min. away from where he lives. I have slowly been thinking of ways to get him back. Long ago I had wished to kill him but did not because I thought I loved him. I can’t prove that most of it was statutory rape because when all of it was found out by my father, David made certain that he and his friends could go against me. Maybe say something like he only wanted to be friends and I was jealous and didnt. He could twist it around for sure. But I’ll take most of the advice here; wait awhile and then hit home.

  9. It seems the world never has a shortage for those type of people. Disheartening isn’t it … but you seem to have a good attitude. In a sense where you’re getting over ‘him’ … and you are because someone else may just stay up at night thinking what “I” did wrong to loose such a scumbag like him.

    Though one thing I’d like to comment on:

    Thinking of ways to torture or get back at him may be necessary for your amusement now, but don’t let it take too much of your time. Rather ask yourself:

    “Hasn’t the bastard taken up too much of my time already?”

    He will get his. That’s how the world works. It’s all about just seeing the situation in different angles.

    -May you be plagued with only wonderful dreams.

  10. (…cont.)


    Quoth Necrologia,

    “This may not always neccessarily be the case, but I think its a possibility. So chill the fuck out you redonedant motherfuck, Nightmaren. Everybody is entitled to an opinion”


    Yes, everyone is entitled to his or her own opinion. Just some are much smarter and sense-worthy, than your stupid ungrateful redundant* (notice the correct spelling) bias grannyfucker comments. So, why don’t you “chill out”? Bitch.


    Also Quoth Ignorance of Necrologia,

    “ and if you can’t get yours across in a mature, civil fashion then maybe you’re the one who needs to shut the fuck up. So the next time you can’t fathom the concept of people seeing things differently from you, maybe you should think before you voice your insights.”

    Well, hmm. Here you are talking to me of mature civil fashion. Maybe you’re the stupid ignorant bitch, who needs to put more thought into things when you say puerile phrases, as “people that help others, are just selfish!

    You are talking to me of “fathoming” the opposites perception? You need to work on your own insight skills (view inwards), you repugnant shit. You weren’t trying to view it from any other person’s point of view, besides your own bias “people that care enough to help you, are selfish” pervicacious shit.

  11. Sorry, wrong board. My post was too large for another board, and I was sending them in sections and accidently posted that one here.

    So I apologize Rose, aaaand good luck with getting away with the murder! Also try and make it look like you’ve gottin’ past him and you are happy…

    Make it look better for you, you’re happy with a new life… A new boyfriend doing so happy and such… Gives them the thought, why would she when she’s all happy now… … also you just may very well be happy, and no longer care to go through with it… … (but kill him anyway, he deserves it)…

  12. Rose – i know it’s hard, and that what i say wont seem to matter, but so many have been betrayed and have thought these thoughts…i know. to be mad at urself for being dumb or niave is unfair…its the same as being mad at emotions-they can’t leave, but you will gradualy learn how to manipulate them

    don’t screw urself over, don’t kill him. rise above him and his level…do something good for yourself and try to live on.

    hell, you can always vent on us

    don’t give up

  13. click, click, click, no no no… Do not Notify me of this crap…

  14. Oh, I see… … I’m sorry RoseTears, I really mean that… … that is very hard-pressing and difficult… Be happy, ha ha. Not many people have me feeling bad for them… …

    But, I’m sorry that that it’s so hard for you, and him as a bad person isn’t getting punished for his greater wrongs…

    Maybe you can move on though?… … Be happy… … I’m sure it is hard to fixate on anything as it may drift for your disgust and horrid for him… ..

    But Time heals all wounds… … Maybe you can become happy in the future, and the past would be just a blur of what used to be, to what it has become (from a future scenario sense)…

    I just hope you can be happy… … be happy!

  15. Damnit! And I unclicked that thing to not notify me… … well, I am glad I read your post though. I hope you become happy now…

    (unclicks that notify thing) Better work…

  16. For Nightmaren,
    I *was* deeply considering doing something to him I should’ve done a long time ago. I was 17 when we first started having sex, but I don’t have any hard hairy evidence to put him away. Then I just thought of how much of a hassle it would all be, even though the gods know he really deserves it. I’m just not sure I want to go thru the whole stress of having him locked away. Besides, as I said before, he could make it seem that I had a highschool crush and wouldn’t take “no” for an answer. Also, he’s in grad in law school and so it’s not like I can get him thrown out. I really wanna go thru with it, but the trouble and everything, after all the shit he’s put me through, I just don’t know if I want the stress of it all. And then worrying about maybe he’ll have his friends go against me and he’ll get off. Dammit, I wish he’d just fucking die.


  17. Rosetears,

    those you beset onto a path to hurt others, will painfully be reminded in the next world….if there is no forgiveness, there will be no mercy…..no quarter given, no sanction onto thee. So smile inside at the image of him for he’s in for a hell of a ride once the man in the black robe comes to collect him………

  18. Rosetears,

    oops forgot to say that was a poem…..anywho, what i was trying to say was….no matter what happens….hes in deep kimshi (crap) in the next life……collision course for eternity with what you felt…..except he gets it forever…….i hope that notion may provide a sliver of hope because there are larger things in this life watching……..

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