Hiding the hurt.

You never know that anyone is hurting.. Until they take it too far.
She wasnt the type that’d kill herself. But, none of us probably are, We hide our feelings and put a smile on, a lot of times.
She was the closest thing to a best friend, I guess, to me.
She wasn’t angry or looked for someoen to blame.. she just accepted things. I didnt talk to her for a week or two befor eher death. I thought she wanted to be alone.
Maybe it was over a boyfriend? Maybe it was over a family issue. But why did she take her life?
Wouldn’t it have been better if she ran away?
It’s just too late to grasp an answer now.
She was always picked on, but she held her head up, high and proud for her thoughs and beliefs. She wasnt an “atheist” or a “Satanist” or ever anything to do with God. She committed her life to being Straight-Edge. It was like.. Religious to her.
At her funeral, Her hair was dyed back to its natural color and it wasnt blue anymore, it was brown. She looked so peaceful, and I just couldnt cry.

A week later, after her parens were cleaning her room, they found a note in her jewelry box. It said

“Whoever gets this, just don’t let anyone have to build things up inside them.. Mom and Dad, you tried to make me something I would never be. Laura, I didnt mean to drift you away for those two weeks. I just didnt trust anyone. I just acted happier those weeks to make it seems like It’d be unexpected. I think I’m peaceful now. And I dont know if i’ll have a brain to think of how I’ll miss you. And ‘ll be underground for a long time… ”

Now I guess we know the reason. She didn’t like this life. But, no one can ask for life. They just get it.

Even if they dont want it…

By |Ava.F|

everytime i leave my house its as if i give up my every right to be left alone or treated with respect You think my difference from you is an excuse to comment on me as if i were on display for you like im the way i am because i want the incessant gawking of strangers There is nothing that brings out the zest of life in people than the impending of their own death. maybe..someday....we will both learn how fragile love is. |swing swing from the tangles of| |my heart is crushed by a former love| |can you help me find a way to carry on again?| A-AR -[swing swing]-