I love you…

Then she came in and he watched her closely with eyes wide-open, as she walked around the room. For the first time in his life he wished he were invisible to her, he wished she would walk away from him.

To leave him alone, even if that would mean being left alone in this place of darkness, which she managed to darken even more with her presence. The ropes seemed to be tightening around his wrists and the back of the chair he sat on. Then suddenly, she turned around and faced him. He felt like her eyes burned holes into his and eventually he looked away.

“So,” she spoke softly, “how are you my dear?” A sarcastic smile appeared on her face. He couldn’t believe it. This cruelty, how could she. How could SHE! The only one he ever loved, the only one who had ever loved him. As he stared into the darkness, he heard her moving closer again, her high heels making a loud noise on the wooden floor. The noise stopped, and slowly he raised his head and looked at the shadowy figure in front of him. The lack of light made the expression on her face somewhat blurry, but he was still able to distinguish that cruel smile.

While he was holding his breath, aware of his vulnerability as she was but a few steps away from him, she sighed: “Don’t…get me wrong.” Then she started to walk around him, so he could hear her voice from behind. “I did love you once.” She stopped. “You know that. And it really hurts me to do this.” She pulled out a knife. “But I believe, I have no choice…”

Suddenly he cried out: “What! What are you doing to me! I’ve never hurt you! I’d never…” “Shut the fuck up!”, she screamed, and the calmness in her voice completely vanished. She came and stood before him again, desperately clenching the large knife in her fine hand. “Just!…shut up!” Her eyes were fixed on him like a wolf’s eyes on his future prey. “I hate it!” she said, “I hate that look on your face, you’re so pathetic! Yes, that’s it…pathetic.” He looked up to her again, with anger written all over his face now, but couldn’t speak a word. Was this his goddess? The girl he had worshipped for so many years? Wasted, everything was just wasted. For she had ruined his life, forever. A tear fell from his cheek and dropped on the floor.

“Why are you doing this?” he murmured, “Why…I don’t understand…please talk to me, dearest.” “Dearest? Dearest! Don’t you ever call me that again! You want to know why, I’ll tell you why; because I fucking hate you! You, your very existence!” And she lifted the hand that was still holding the knife up in the air, grasped a stroke of his hair with the other, and then cut it off. “What do you think you’re doing!” he yelled at her, as she stood there, enraged, and with a stroke of hair in her hands. “Prelude to deathe…” she whispered, staring absently at the knife, “Before people kill themselves…they cut off their hair.”

What the hell was she talking about? He started to sweat even more, but his fear just seemed to encourage her. “You know what you are?! You’re crazy! No, even worse, you’re insane! Out of your fucking mind!”, he screamed. “Yes I am! I AM insane! And I believe it’s time now dear! Any last words!” The knife flickered above him again, but he knew it was going to serve for a different purpose now. “No! Please! You can’t do this…I love you!”

For a few moments she looked at him filled with disbelief, then she dropped her arm and turned away. He watched her. She couldn’t. He knew she couldn’t…Suddenly she started to laugh, and she turned around to him again so he could see the tears falling from her eyes, as her laughter became hysterical. “You cannot…love me”, she said, and lifting the knife up in the air again: “You cannot…LOVE ME!” Then she stabbed the knife in his throat, and again and again, and her tears kept dripping on the floor, along with the blood.

Finally she stepped back, dropped the knife, and stared at the dead body, as it sat there soulless. “I hate him”, she thought, “I fucking hate him…”


Does it matter who I am to the world?