im to dead to cry.

something is growling in me. a pain i do possess
for within me is a demon
my soul’s put to the test
inside i am a child dying dead and gone

and for this pain i wonder
why is death taking so long?
the times i had in childhood
bitter in yet sweet
at times i found life wonderful. and everything was neat
and then he walked into my world
i was fucked up in the head
i never wanted it to happen
but whats done is done and said
the scars are on my body
i remember the smell of cut flesh
and looking at these scars i wonder
am i really such a mess?
at times i think its funny
just how dead i could feel
and how nothing is growing
and how nothing feels so real
i don’t want you to bother
you should all go and rest
at least you can have slumber
going to sleep is something i detest
tortured in the daylight by the unforgiving sun
and tormented in the night time
by something or someone
and deep inside i wonder… was this all ment to be?
cause that unhealing wound is growing
deep benieth where the eye can’t see
but still i try not to fade
but when i look at myself
a zombie hides my reflection
a descrace is what i am.
but fuck it who really cares
deep inside that demon stares
its cold mommy so cold
i want to be to dead
to dead to cry to dead to die
and with that all i wonder why
when i was young it was so fresh
what robbed my lifes innocence?
and deep inside i fester.
blister burn and peel
and feeling i dont feel
what the fuck is real?
if anyone is out there. who truely understands
then heed my simple warning
someone lend me that helping hand
that hand i thought i needed
i spit and cry in grief
for mourning is not passing
those wounds are far to deep.

-thank you for reading my work. may it help you somehow. perhaps more then i could ever save myself

By dead child

thru my life i have been wondering just who i am. since i was a child i knew i was a bit diffrent. while the girls my own age played with dolls i drew pictures and ran around in the yard acting like a creature (smiles) and now i sit in my darkened room. listen to music and enjoy what ever pleasures i can seem to get from that. i hope you enjoy my work. i am just kinda starting out but i hope one day i will be able to develope into a talented writter. -to all who care enough to read