Krys are you out there?

Tonight I felt compelled to type, to have a record on paper about someone very important to me. This is about a person of whom I deeply love, and for a time was in love with. His name is Christopher Voss, Krys for short. A very odd and beautiful individual, that to this day I could figure out for the life of me! I’ll never forget the first time I laid eyes on him. Quite tall, well over six feet, anorexicly thin, makeup, a long velvet dress and vinyl sleeveless overcoat, and beautiful platinum hair that went to his waist. He walked through those glass doors, and everyone stopped to look. That faintly sickened me.

Check it out, new transfer.Fag, most likely, gross.Afraid of ass rape? Piss off.Who are you guys talking about, Her? Err…him? I tried not to stare, like my friends around me where. I wasn’t from this small town, like they were. I’d moved just a year ago on Halloween, cliché as it sounds if you knew what I looked like. The school would just barely allow me to adjust, with the exceptions of the god fearing and ignorant. This guy had no chance in hell, bluntly put.If you have to ask, then that’s who where talking about.“I think he’s gorgeous.” There, I said my peace. It was laid out for everyone to hear. A risk I wouldn’t have felt right expressing about six or so months ago.Okay, whatever. A girl said slowly. I hate it what people do that. Use such idiotic, meaningless words to make you feel stupid. Sure he is. Said a short sophomore, whose comment dripped with sarcasm. They wouldn’t think any differently of me for my remark. They would just excuse it because of my fascination for the “unusual” as they called it, and because I missed the diversity and acceptance of my beautiful city. My best friend patted me on the head, and smiled.Of course you do, you’re the little freak.Why thank you, love. I almost forgot my status in this click. We laughed, and I again looked back at him, but he was gone. Damn. I had the chance to make him feel welcome, and I didn’t do that. I still curse myself. At the end of the day I heard nothing but talk about this person. Did you see the fight that new creepy looking guy, and Robert S**** got into?Holy shit that was vicious! The janitor was mopping up blood!I did know it was that bad… I hadn’t seen him at all. The fight didn’t worry me; fights were never reported unless a teacher saw, but Robert was a big, homophobic jerk. What a way to start your first day.I was hoping to see him later that day, but I didn’t, it was a wonderful surprise when I saw him get on my over crowed bus. No one sits with me, so I waved to him. He pointed to himself, and mouthed…Me? I nodded. His painted mouth went from a frown to a straight line, and then smiled at me when I noticed he had to cock his head all the way to the side to prevent it from hitting the ceiling. Hi. Thanks. Don’t mention it, I was the new kid last year. I took off my sunglasses, and thus our friendship began. That day I gained a friend; I was yet that find, that I would also develop a brother, protector, and lover in a sense. We talked passionately about everything imaginable, as lovers do. We took in each other’s words, as those in love take in adoring kisses. And penetrated one another’s minds like those who penetrated each other while in bed. Weeks pasted it was time to take him home! Are you sure your mom won’t freak? You told her about me, right, every gory detail? She doesn’t care! She loves me, you love me, and so she’ll love you! Yet another milestone, he gained a family. From that day on, Krys frequented my home, and during the summer he came every night. We fell asleep together often, his head on my chest, mine on his, outside, inside every chance we got we fell asleep talking. We would talk in our sleep if we could. Together we braved ignorance and mindless criticism, but being so close also exposes dark secret sides of ourselves we refuse to show even our closest. I later found bruises on his legs, and permanent welts on his back. His mother. No wonder he never wanted me to come to his house, shame. He felt comfortable changing in front of me, and I didn’t mind, so I couldn’t help but notice his torn and pierced penis. Dear god, have you been to a doctor? Yes, I’m fine I swear… What about the police, or social services? I have a record, and I’m 18 in a two weeks. But- Please, you’re the only person I’ve never lied to. Trust me. I do, and ok… NO! How do you expect me to live with something this! I don’t. We held each other, and wept. Soon after, his visits became less and less common. When school started he never came. Maybe he just couldn’t take it here any more. The fights, the ridicule, the accusations made by the administration. The comforting words of my friend were fledging, for I miss my love dearly. I part of me died when I realized he wasn’t coming back. What I was most concerned about was I didn’t have any word if he safe or not. He never went home. I was in a constant state of panic for a month. Until, I heard knocking at my back door, I got out of bed and put on my cloak. Everyone was asleep; I opened the door, nothing. Just a black envelope in the snow with silver trim, swirls, and words: To the loveliest fallen angel: I miss you. I will be fine, and I’ll contact you when I can.All my love, Krys There was more but it is far to personal, I wrote this for anyone who has ever loved anyone the way I loved Krys, and Krys if your out there I miss you. You still have a home and a family here the address in the same so is the number. I love you my dear friend, I always will.

By The Evil Cheezman

Purveyor of sacred truths and purloined letters; literary acrobat; spiritual godson of Edgar Allan Poe, P.T. Barnum, and Ed Wood; WAYNE MILLER is the head architect of EVIL CHEEZ PRODUCTIONS, serving up the finest in entertainment and edification for the stage, the page, and the twain screens, silver and computer. He is the axe-murderer who once met Andy Griffith.


  1. I hope for both of your sakes that you get reunited.
    What has been done to him is the kind of behavior that makes me sick to the stomach.
    That it comes from a parent is sick and that it comes from a stranger is sick.
    And they kill animals for less…
    If you or your friend need a safe haven, gimme a call.
    Fuck its sick…

  2. I think it is really fucked up how people get treated just because they dress differently. That happens a lot here in Idaho. When i paint my finger nail’s black, the first thing people say is he must be a fag. I can definitely relate to krys, and hope you find him.

  3. this is both butifull and sad i do love someone the way you love krys and i hope he never leaves me.also i hate the way people treat others like krys and my “friends” think of me to as “the little freak” of the (small) town i live they pretty much shrugg off anything i say about “unusual” people even my “unusual” friends they just dont care who they hurt with what they say.even me ‘cuz i have to admitt whan they say those things about people they dont- or barley- even know do they think the same things about me?

  4. It is awful what has been done to such a lovely person who you care about so much-i hope for your and his sake that you get reunited.

    Good luck and Blessed Be

  5. geezhuz! you have me in tears over here goil!

    i hope you find him. i’ll light a candle for you both.

  6. I hope that whereever you are, you and Krys find each other again. I’ve had to deal with bmy best friend really falling for a guy (I call him Lover-boy) and well, he can’t admit his feelings and she’s waiting for him to make the first move towards a more permenant relationship.

    I once though I was in love but oh girl, I hope you find him. The guy I fell for had a tough life like your Krys did and had just as much tuff done to him that it makes me sick to think about how much Krys must’ve suffered for so many scars and so much pain. No matter how dreadful it seems, don’t give up hope on finding him – you will find him; people who really fall in love can’t escape thier lovers any more than a scar can heal in a day.

    Krys, if you’re raeding this, listen up: don’t feel ashamed. Don’t be afraid. Don’t hide and shrink from love and friendship like I have done. One of the worst thinsg you can ever do is not let someone care for you – she obvisouly cares for you and she just wants to help you. If you’re reading this Krys, go back and talk to her or meet her – she just cares.

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