Let down once too often….

I dont know what you would really call what im writing?????Well, anyway im really REALLY depressed, stressed everything dismal you could possibly imagine, im feeling it.Well, anyway i suppose i better explain why i feel the way i do……

3 weeks ago i found out that there was this x-mas gothic ball being held about 2 hours from where i live, driving distance, and right away i KNEW i wanted to go, i mean who wouldnt? So, the next day i went into college and told all my “friends” about it. To my knowledge they seemed engulfed by the idea.I went out of my way to plan EVERYTHING out transport, costs, times, and how many of us were going, which was “seven” of us supposedly.

Anyway, to cut a long story short three weeks have gone by and basicallly the “seven” has gone down to two.My so called “friends” told the one who is still coming last minute that they couldnt make it. I mean, im not engraged because they cant come because of “money issues” or whatever their shitty excuses were,it’s more to do with the fact that they didnt have the balls to confront me themselves about it. I mean, come to think of it where they even going to tell me at all if my friend hadnt of told me???? I would have really respected them so much more if ONLY they would have confronted me about it. I thought they were my friends?? But, no as per usual i never really do have friends but, i always seem to ensare “friends,” fakes, liars, arogant beings. So, you would think in event of all this they would speak to me at least but, have they??? No, of course they havent.They even have the cheak to twist the knife back at me, as though IM the baddy, and that it’s MY fault for not being more “sympathetic” fort their lack of “money” .Im SICK and im TIRED of this behaviour, im the most affable person i know.Do i really deserve this?Everyone is inimical.I really think i am cursed, nothing EVER goes right even the littlest things go wrong…….
like the old saying goes “It never rains, but it pours” is just so true.So, the result of all this has left me yet again betrayed, enraged and fucked and because of people like THEM. The irony of it all is that people disgress why i never Trust anyone.

The only way to make this world live, is to OBLITERATE the entire human race.Because as far as i am concerned the human race is a joke.