my parents left at 11:00 PM to go out to eat and left me and my older brother a chore list i was doing my chores like i do every other day. my older brother decides to come and jump on me and starts to punch me in the arm with his fist with the pimps rings, he punched me till it bled (hes a lot stronger). i pushed him off and went to my room and came back out with my favorite cutting knife, i walked toward him cassually like i was going back to chores, he was sitting on the bean bag chair. i walked behind him but he heard me and jumped up before i could do anything. he ran into the kitchen and got out a butchers knife, and we walked toward each other, i made my knife visable and he held up the butchers knife. i went to slice him, with sucess, i only cut his troat enough to bleed a little, with his sucess he sliced my stomache and drew blood more than what i did to him. didn’t need stiches, but later on, my neighbors heard a fight so called the cops. they added to my criminal record and contacted my mother. they came home a half hour later and cussed my brother out and decided to send me to a hospital. i told her i didn’t need stiches, its not that deep, but my mom said “we’re not talking about a medical hospital” so the night past, i packed my cloths with pain as i bent down to grab my living dead doll. i left that morning, i got to the hospital and got roomed up with a girl that was really crazy. i didn’t see any crazy-ness in her as we talked but her way toward the employees were horrable. her name was becca, she has said to be in there for more than 4 years(that paticuaul building), transford twice, in the first one for 1 year. but we got to know each other and i had met other girls around my age, for mostly the same reason as me, except wanting to kill themselves. one month went by and one of the girls about to be released named sabbrina, said that her father called and said they moved out of state so they would be able to pick her up later then what they were supposed to. (shes one of those “must kill” type of girls, very depressed girl) sure enough, she killed herself, with a death letter saying her parents never liked her, neither has her siblings, and she lived too far. me nor the other people could understand why shes done that, she was about to be released. we found what she used the next morning, it was a rusty razor she has snuck in, dry blood on the blade end. about a week after that, my boyfriend called to see how i was doing, i told him everything and all the people i met, i told him how the phones were cordless cuz they think we’re going to use to cord to hand thereand how they won’t work if your more than 5 feet away from the charger. he chuckled about the conversations i told him. then said that he doesn’t wanna go out with me until i’m out of the “mental hotel” as he puts it. so i wait in my room being depressed until someone comes in to talk to me (don’t ask, they normally do) so i tell him he was being all cool and decided to break up at the last min. they really care about me, they became mad but i don’t see why, its my life, soon to end, some more time went by, became my birthday, we had a big party, and marrgret (the nurse person) made a giant cake, but i gave it to all the people on my floor of the hospital (i knew everyone there in case you were wondering) i had no cake. i’m never usually hungry, they force me to eat, but i only have breakfast and thats it. so they made me stay longer to fix that problem. an other one of my friends, ashley, was sleeping normally, then woke up, and freaked out, and got sent to the “padded wall” room, i went back asleep 2 hours later. my parent visited the day after that incodent. they said they would be less harsh on me when i get back, i really didn’t want to go back home, i loved the people there. medication was bad, and the rules you had to try and fallow, but then i did want to go home to see everyone i missed. marrgret says i could leave anytime i wanted, even tomorrow if i wanted. but i decided to stay one more week, and talk to everyone. i coulda done that for the past 5 months, but i could talk more. i was the only person there who dressed in black, everyone else wore pink(ew) and yellow, or white, the week past and i went home. my parents wanted to take me out and do a spending spree on me, and took me to hot topic, where i bought about 10 pairs of pants and a few shirts to go with them, then i got 2 more living dead dolls, and a hat, and emily junk. it was great. i felt like walking around town when i spotted my ex, and i suppose his new girl friend making out in the gazibo. i walked away, and went to josh’s house (a friend of mine), he cheered me up, fallowed with a kiss. he walked me home, and he became my new boy friend, but knowing that Nick (ex) broke up with me for a tramp, still made me depressed inside, leading to cuts. but when i got home i didn’t see my brother anywhere, and i haven’t seen him for a few weeks, which meant no fights, (yay) but i have a feeling i’ll be back to visit all the other girls. eventually i seen becca walking the streets, i asked her if she remembered me and she did so we became best friends, and we are still best friends. its been 2 years ago from now that my brother cut my stomache, and if you wanted to know on that, he has a scar on his troat and i have the bigger scar on my stomache!!!
_~*~_Clarissa_~*~_