now im numb

ive been suicidel before, ive been happy before, ive been numb,
my whole life i have had m,v,p a heart problem i never realy thought it much a bother to me i could sill live a happy long life untill 3 months ago i had a drug od and i found out it advaned to cardiomyopathy which is basicly fatal i just turned 19 and my heart has all ready inlarged a little bit last night i ran up the stairs and it was like runing a mile, when i had the od i dyed for a little bit over a minute then the doctors brought me back the funny thing is it didnt hurt it was realy the most beautiful way to die i was fine then i just fell down i have a deadly illness now i dont want to die i was suicidel for a long time then i was happy for awhile now im numb….basicly when sad and suicidle never wish to die wish to truely live, wish to be happy when your dying its to late…

By Timber wolf

i lived in milwaukie tell i was 4 years old then i moved to the middle of nowhere i write music im in a band and i have just been diagnosed with cardiomyopathy a could be fatal disease