He sits there motionless and silent. He
just rests in his chair, recollecting upon what
he had done. Everything had gone according to
plan. Just as they had said.
They told him of
how she would be alone in her house that previous
evening. They told him in what room she would be
in, and exactly how he was to do it.
So, at midnight he went to her house and cut
a hole in the living room window, and carefully
climbed in. He crept slowly and cautiously down
the hall, taking in all of the pictures. They
were mostly of a little girl and an older woman.
Was the little girl who he sought at that moment?
Then he saw it. The light at the end of the
hall. The room in which she layed. He froze.
Now was the time. He didn’t want to do it, but
if he didn’t they would have avengance. They
would punish him.
Slowly, he proceeded to the door. It was
partly open. He peeked in through the crack.
There she was, sound asleep. She had left the
light on.
As he stood there, staring at her stationary
form, his hand began to tremble, and he began to
sweat. But he opened the door more, none the
less. Silently he crept into the room. He then
proceeded to approach the bed, on which she layed.
Then, out of fear and regret, he attacked.
He whipped out with gloved hands, and stabbed her
in the chest. He then slit her throat before she
rose out of her slumber. As he did, he
remembered the look of intense, blinding pain.
She barely had time to gasp, and struggle to hold
onto her life before all went quiet and still.
He stood there motionless. Thoughts of what
he had just done buzzed in his head. Once he
regained his senses, he walked to her bedside
table, turned out the light, and left out the
front door.
Now he rises from his chair, and walks to
his dresser. And as the scene fades, there is a
gunshot followed by a thud, then complete silence.
It was a very interesting story. I enjoyed it very much. You should develop the character more. If you add more as to why he goes there and kills her it would make it much more interesting
i agree with smilie…yet a very good short story…keep on writin 😉 hAvOc
brillent. well written. it made me feel unsafe. lol. i always feel that way. beautifuly done however. i like your work. you should add more characteristics to your chacter and repost it then your story would be even more bad ass. lol. love
spider_voice/nyquil_junkie
i liked it. exactly the way it was. it leaves a sense of mystery, like you could tell all but you don’t need to. it’s exquisite. wonderful work.
Isn’t remorse the second most powerful emotion, besides that of love? But pain is the deepest….. The longest to forget…..