As I sit here reading the submissions that everyone has so generously put forth, only one thought comes to my mind. Why do these submitters write this way? Why are their submissions so forlorn? Do they (and I) have nothing better to write about than death?
I guess maybe it is because death is so… realistic. You know? I suppose they (and I) could write about a lustrous love life; a win of the lottery; meeting that special someone; an unimaginable journey into a fantasy land. But, to the average Joe that most of us are, this all seems a little far-fetched, wouldn’t you say? So, instead of latching onto something that might never happen, they (and I) grasp something that is so inevitable. It will happen to them (us). They (we) will see it. It will come. It’s only a matter of time, of course. And some luck, I would think.
Then there are those whom hasten along the process by which we live. Well, I guess I should say that they only write about it. Why write? Isn’t there that philosophy that most try to live by? Actions speak louder than words… So maybe these people are so afraid of committing this heinous act, that they choose to write about their somewhat twisted ‘fantasy’ instead. I say right on! So what if all of these people are afraid to do what other people look down upon? So what if these people are too stubborn to take their own life. So what if they venture away from their flock of suicidal robots? Though they may want fulfill this conspiracy with death, they realize that this will solve nothing at all.
I, personally, think those who even think about committing this act are extremely selfish. Yes, I said SELFish. The only people that they are relieving are themselves. Think about it. No, really THINK. When one commits that blind act, they hurt a lot of people. Their family, their friends (Yes, we all have some, even though some say that they don’t) their teachers, admirers, crushes, and whomever else might be included in that list. The point still stands that someone WILL get hurt. What of the other people who may rejoice? Eh.. who cares about them anyway? They’re just a freaking nobody like you. Besides, if they want you to kill yourself, if they SCREAM at you to do it, why give them the satisfaction of winning?
And now I bring forth my next question. Why do some pretend that they are going to go through with something that they are too afraid to do? Perhaps they seek what the majority of us need: attention. Or maybe they have fine-tuned their needs to depend on that somewhat fake feeling of self-pity and regret. This is all quite understandable. For me, anyway. But there really is no need to go through all of this! Why put yourself through so much emotional stress? Why not live the way you want? Why not forget what other people say/think, and focus on what you say and think. Why not take your fat, freakish, ugly self and run naked through the isles of loneliness and scream at those sitting ducks that you pass by, “Look at me!! Look at me!! I am the one you envy! I am the one that does everything for myself! And I don’t give a **** about what you say or think!! Look at me!!” Then you run your naked self right up to them, smack ’em around a bit, and you go climb that mountain, or swim in that gorgeous blue sea… *shrug* Or whatever works for you, I guess. 😉 Farewell.
-Tiana White