The End

I submitted two posts on here, one named “What to do?!?” and, the other being the “follow up” to my first post.

I guess im just writing on here to say fuck what i wrote, fuck them both, fuck EVERYTHING i wrote.Why did i even bother to write it? I was fooling myself to believe anything would happen, NOTHING good ever comes my way.

So, im not going to BOTHER with guys or girls AT ALL!!! I’ll become a spinster, the idea of that is not so bad, i’ve spent my whole life alone anyway so, what difference will another couple of years make? well, that is if im alive for that long.Is that so wrong to feel this way? Is it so wrong? No, it’s not…….
Im happy to just sit at home alone in my bedroom by
myself with my little black cat, Fang, doing what i like…..
reading, writing poetry, listening to music, drawing, and coming online.I dont want “friends”
having no friends at all would suit me fine.You dont have the worry then if people are talking behind your back about you, betraying you, lying to you and the neurotic feeling of going to
everyday and disgress on who will speak to you today.I dont want any of that, i dont want to socialise with the “happy-clappy people” i dont fit in but, then again i dont fit into this absurd society.Hving to listen to antagonistic people when
walking down the high street and disgress who will be the first narrow minded commoner to shout “HAHAHAHAH oh god,
look at the state of that fucker” and then mutter to themselves under their breath “fucking goths”or,to see how the human race is such a joke and everything in it is SHIT and arogant and, how everyone is cloned and FAKE!!! and,so what if i live my life in a bubble and want to live in the “Never
Never land” like in Walt Disney’s Peter Pan and never grow up
and that my nature is a prissy one for an almost to be, in one week, an “18 year old” so what, age is just a number right?
and, i CAN wear the way i do my black make-up anywhere and,it’s not something i only wear for “gigs” and, NOT to wear
on a “day to day” basis, as my insolent mother would say, another person i loathe at times but, yet i LOVE her
with all my heart and soul for everything she does for me.
but, that is another story within itself.

All people do anyway is break each others hearts and it ends in tears. And you know when people say “you shouldnt go out looking for love, love will find it’s way to you?”well, FUCK that too, what a load of bullshit that is. I have gone out looking for love, i have waited for love, i WROTE the fucking book.Love is a game, an illusion for psychopaths and fools and, i fell in the trap, caught in the spiders web and, now the big bad spider has eaten my heart and taught me a lesson.

There is NO-ONE out there who feels just like me
There is NO-ONE out there who is just like me.
Makes no sense at all.

:: ~ Forever Darkness ~ ::