what have i done?

what did he do to you? i didn’t mean to leave you all alone. god i’m so sorry. i didn’t even think that he could do that to anyone – let alone you.
you were so innocent and i let you down. if i had known what was to happen that nite i never would have left you there with him.

i know that you were out of it but i didn’t think that anyone would take advantage of you like that.
looking at you now, you are just a shadow of what you once were. i have just about given up on finding that sparkle that was once in your eyes. but i could never give up on you. not after leaving you with him to do with you what he pleased.
i will never get over this guilt and you will never get over what happened to you.
but i want you to know that i am so, so, sorry.
i look at you lying on the ground – helpless. you are still so innocent, yet you have been dragged down into the dark despair of addiction too many times that you don’t think you can make it back into this world. what happened wasn’t your fault, and seeing you like this hurts me more than you can imagine because i was responsible for you. i said i would look after you and i didn’t.
i just hope that it isn’t too late to save you, because without you i wouldn’t be who i am today. you made me into the person i always wanted to be. i looked up to you in idolism. and even though you have fallen, i know that you can get back up and show the world that you are not just another drug addict.and that you can make it. i know this because you have done it before. so please stacie, please come back to prove them all wrong. i wasn’t there for you then, but i am now and i won’t let you down again. i just want you to come back from this to the way that you were before. i know that this can’t happen. but i want it more than anything.
i just want to walk into your room one day and hear you say the words : ” I came back to show you I could fly ”
because then i would know that you are going to be alright…………………….