No, not really. I have some issues. My boyfriend Devon, yeah he wants to have sex with me. We’ve done other things a few friday nights at this ice rink…it’s like an event every friday from 8-10 we go to the ice rink and…skate..socialize..and in our case take off our skates, walk around the property till we find a spot and like…well i gave him head and he fingered me and i gave him a handjob…and he wants to go even further. and so do i. but i dun know if i’m ready or not.
my friend was telling me how she had sex when she was 13 (i’m 13) and she regretted it because it took 4 months of her tears because it was non-stop bleeding and she didnt get her period for like 4 months so she had to take all of these tests. and her friend got an abortion and she hasnt been the same…she’s been crying every day and her friend is 14 now…so it was a year ago for her.
but anyway i dont know what the hell to do. i want to have sex…with devon…not with anyone else…weel maybe marilyn manson but being realistic i WANT to have sex with DEVON. he says he loves me. and i think i love him. but then again i am only 13, and who am i to say what love means? and i still have no idea if i’m “ready” for this whole sex thing. infact if i went to skating TODAY i probably would be having sex with him in like an hour. but i want to know what i’m getting into. and if you’re just going to fucking yell at me without being helpful dont even fucking bother cuz i’ll just ignore you. yell at me all you want…just be helpful eh?
I don’t think you want a young pregnancy. I didn’t have one, but I know a girl in 6th grade she’s pregnant. She ain’t even thirteen yet. I am. But not pregnant. But I remember wanting to have sex with this guy ZI had a crush on. I was so angry I was gonna ask him. That’s how desperate I was. But don’t have sex. Here’s a few reasons (ehem) 1) young pregnancy (your parents will probabl;y yell at you like crazy) 2)its against the law to have sex at this age, don’t believe me? ask your health teacher or look it up. I’m serious I had health for the last nine weeks. believe me. 3) STDS (sexually transmitted diseases.) do u want crabs? those things are gross. Then again, HIV. siphilis, etc. want me to name anymore? 4) He could leave you the next day. Really. Words have meaning, yes, but sometimes there not true. He could just be goin for the sex. So those are all reasons that you shouldn’t have sex. Okay? And I wasn’t yelling. bye…
Well, i’m just going to say that i have a couple friends who have had sex and are basically fine, and they didn’t have any side effects so maybe ur friend is lying to u to scare you but i don’t know. And none of them are pregant but it’s all in chance, so u could get pregant if ur not taking birth control and dat dat dat da i don’t need to tell u i ain’t ur mother and never will be. And ya i agree with ya on the love thing, i think i love this guy but i don’t know, i really don’t and i’m only 14, he’s 16. But one question, what would your parents think? i know a lot of my friends were pushed away one of them even had to go live with another friend for a while…a long while.
Well…since it’s your first time…or so I’m assuming don’t think it will feel good. There is a hymen that has to be broken, if it hasn’t already by accident, and your going to be streched unless your not tight..which your 13 and you might be. You should be fine other than that, and just tell him to be careful.
-Elizabeth
If you do, use some lube, but remember you are very young, and someday you will regret it if you have sex with him.
use a womens condom with spermicide (those things do exist im serious) go to a drug store to get it. you’ll regret wot u do im telling u that now.
-elizabeth
I’ve been in the same position of should I? shouldn’t I? and I’m REALLY glad I chose not to, since that relationship ended I’ve sat down and thought about it, coming to the conclusion that doubting that your ready is a clear sign that you’re not. The fact that you have to ask yourself shows you that you aren’t sure, and if you really want it to be special then you should wait until you just know that it’s what you want to do.
Just thought I’d offer that, but in the end of course it’s all up to you. Whatever you decide, be sensible and be prepared to get hurt emotionally…
I just wanted to say thank you all very much for all of your suggestions. It really has helped me come to the conclusion that I’m not ready, and I don’t want to have sex with him. The last post, by Sethera, just sealed my decision. Thanks for all of your help. Before I was worried because I didn’t want his friends making fun of him because we didn’t do it and because I was afraid that he’d like…leave me if I didn’t want to have sex. But if that last thing does happen, I probably would’ve regretted it more if I did have sex with him, and for the first one, none of his friends did half the crap we did so they can’t say anything anyway.
Anyway…THANKS a lot. It really helped. But he still wants to do other things with me and I honestly…dun want to very much…so I’m debating on whether or not I should do what we’ve been doing anymore. He seems to enjoy it but I’m not. So, yeah. Thanks again.
you’re welkcome
I’m always glad to help, and theres no point in doing things like that if you aren’t enjoying it – you’ll get bored! (plus it’ll show so he won’t enjoy it as much). If you have any doubts about it then just try to talk to him, you seem like a sensible person so just trust your instincts. 🙂
well how long have you been dating this guy? very long?? if you really want to have sx with him then no matter what anyone tell you, you will but just make sure that you really love him and that he loves you. I know know how is feel to have a person drop you after he gets what he wants, but anyways make sure you get all your bases covered like condoms and stuff like that. But just make sure your parents dont find out. If they are anything like mine they will kill you. Good luck. hope i helped.
If you don’t want to do something then don’t. And if you stop the stuff that you are doing, I think you will find out a lot about your relationship, and this guy. And remember Men often give love for sex, women often give sex for love. and Neither is right.
I see you already replied yourself, but I’m still gonna add my say 🙂
I think if you are unsure, you are not Really ready… My last boy/f, I nearly did, and after we split we really really fell out (which is sad, cause I think it’s better to stay friends) and I was so glad I didn’t have sex with him.. Everytime there’s a guy I think about sleeping with I end up falling out with him and hating him lol.
Wow @ what Profigacy said, totally agree 🙂
And I hope ya listened to what everyone else said about taking precautions, using protection, it not being perfect first time, underage sex and young pregnancy. I’m sure you’re not stupid, and when you feel ready you will know 🙂
no1 can really tell u if ur ready or not. its all up to u. if u r having douts that u arent ready, then ur probably not. i lost it at 13 aswell. im 15 now. do i regret it? that i can not tell u. all i know is that i wasnt ready. it was just a desperate attemt to keep that love in my life. but it ended. thank god. but neway just to make a long storie short, just b absolutely sure b4 u do nething. use a condom too. 😉
-FANGSthatKILL-
I almost lost it when i was 13 to. But what darkangelwonderz said is true to. Do what you like and hell you only got one life to live, huh? Might as well live it.. even if it is a mistake we all make them…. Me and my girl thought she was pregnant becuase she was 2 weeks late.. thank whatever saved us
woot thanks guys a lot. i really appreciate your posts and everything and it’s really helping me a lot. and dun think that just because of what i said up there before that i’m not reading your posts. i am. i just dun respond. so i am listening and just know that i do appreciate all of you.
WOW, so many people soo much advice like alot of them say u will know when the time is right… but i do have one idea to help u out…. don’t make it in a ice rink please…. well what else can i say that’s missing umm….*Scroling*..wow so much good advice what to add umm ummm enjoy what your doing now and don’t worry about sex sure it will be in the back of ur head but remember that there is more to life then sex. like…. in a bedroom doing stuff can sometimes be more exciting than in a ice rink and vice-versa so remember… try new and different things, like paintball and see what happends 😉 soo soo fun me and my girl had alot of fun at paintball and after words it was the best time we ever had together and we didn’t even have sex that day.. it was just different somehow… but GOOD ohh boy was it good i will never forget that day for as long as i live *sigh* i just won’t go into detail 😉
If you a virgin, you think “If I die tomorrow, I will die a virgin” or if you’re not a virgin, you could live for a long time in regret…… O_o Just thinking…
Here is my opinion. I am 15 years old. I lost my viginity 5 days before my birthday in which was febuary 1st 2003. Before hand i had been dating a guy for 8 months…and he always tried to talk me into sex. And deep sown i knew that we woulnd’t be together forever. I think that you have to sit down and say if this person were to leave me in the next few days would i regret it? The next question you need to ask yourself is when i am 20 and i look back on this will i care that i lost it to this guy… another question to ask your self is will things be weird after wards. Sit down and have a converstion with him that will help alot of things.And it may take you a few months to think about it….. But if you are unsure about it then there is no way you should do it. I am with my boyfriend it has been two months since we had done that and I knew for sure that It would be ok to have sex and I know i won’t regret it!
Be safe too!!
One thing before i go into this, Calinta.. i am also 15 with my B-day on February 1st.. hehe but the funny thing about it is, is that i first had sex around that time before my birthday too:P But newho like i have said yes, i have lost my virginity. But at an age of 13, you will want to think because guys are very much assholes at that age( no offence to any 13 year old boys but i’ve had bad experience with guys around that age) and they just might want to fuck and chuck you. I’m not saying that your boyfriend will, but we never know since we dont know his personality. And how long have you been going out? you should at least be going out with him after a few months.. rushing things get you into bad trouble. but like people have been saying, its up to you. We’re just giving advice. oh and 1 piece of major advice ALWAYS USE CONDOMS! dont ever not use one. you might regret it one day. Well i hope that helped you in anyway doesnt matter if it didnt. meh. Hope you have good future relationships! Be Smart! Toodles!
Listen, I’m thirteen too, and I know a girl who has been pregnant before, and had an abortion. She’s younger than I am. she is emotionally unstable, and still has sex in an effort to make herself grown up. Sex is a grown up thing. she wasn’t grown, I’m not grown, and neither are you. We’re really just little girls, we don’t know what love is, we can’t even usually grasp death completely. No thirteen-year-old should be ready for something like sex, and the commitment that go’s with it. And if they are, I fell sorry for them. The world must have been cruel.
Two Things
First It’s ok to be a Virgin. I am, (and I’m 20). I don’t flaunt it around. My friends know and some times they make fun of me becaue of it but its in fun so I don’t mind.
And Second There is this Girl I like She is a Freak all into drugs and sex and the works no ambitions never goes to School.
When I see her around we talk She hates the idea of a relationship she just wants sex I think she likes me too. Shes all I ever think about. I haven’t told her how I feel. I think she would stop talking to me.
I think you should also wait until you are ready. The world is full of cruel people and your bf my dump you after he gets what he wants. I am seventeen and I lost my virginity when I was 11 years old. Yes I know I was a very young child. I did it because I wanted to be loved and the guy that I lost it to was 14, yes, alot older than me. He said he loved me and of course I thought I loved him too but I was only 11, what did I know right? Well I regret it. After that I didn’t have sex until I was 16, and every day it was a different guy. I can’t exactly tell you why I had sex with a defferent guy everday. Of course I used condoms.I don’t regret anything I ever did. But I do still think about it and I am emotional about it. But me and my boyfriend of now had sex before we started going out…and we have been together for 9 months now. But it’s not every day you find a guy that will stick by your side after you guys do the “Deed”. Well just becareful. And if you and to think about it you are ready then your not ready. If you have to question yourself about loving him then you don’t love him. Peace Out.
“BE SMART! BE CAREFUL”
“I have no conscience, none, but I would not like to bring a soul into this world. When it sinned and when it suffered something like a dead hand would fall on me, — ”You did it, you, for your own pleasure you created this thing! See your work!” If it lived to be eighty it would always hang like a millstone round my neck, have the right to demand good from me, and curse me for its sorrow. A parent is only like to God: if his work turns out bad so much the worse for him; he dare not wash his hands of it. Time and years can never bring the day when you can say to your child, ”Soul, what have I to do with you?” – – – Olive Schreiner – – –
Hi everyone,
I’ve been gone for ages now, you’s probably don’t give a flying-fuk, but I’m 16 male, I was pressured into sex (I know chiks usually fall victim, but a girl fooled me), I hate that day, it was dirty, and bloody, and…
forget it, I’m trying to say I wish I could meet you cryingknives, I want to save you, guys are pigs, in nature almost all male species rape the females and leave. My best friend was sexually abused at age 11, and by age 13 was pumped full of alcomahol and raped under the old bridge. After that she became loose and gave head to any love interest. Please email me and talk about the oral sex thing, please. I wish the world wasn’t like this. Fuck the poor people of afganistan, cuz even when your in the rich and lucky country you still suffer. (no I’m not racsist).
The only reason I enjoy sex now, is because I want it, when I didn’t want it, I hated it and I regret ever being tricked.
Remember condoms are only 95-98% effective so every 20th to 50th time it’s as if your not using a condom. Condoms should only be use for random encounters. If you(or anyone) is going to get into a sexual relationship use better protection then condoms, there are plenty to chose from. And before you get into any kind of sexual relationship you should both be checked for STDs. And never, never, NEVER forget about the morning after pill.
B_C_K you seem like a smart girl with a good head on your shoulders. And you will be surprised at how little that means if you get pregnant or an STD. if you can, put your emotions aside and take a good look at this guy. I don’t trust him, and I get that only form what you have said about you and him. . . . I’m gona keep my good eye on him. And remember you can learn a lot about your relationship by not having ANY kind of sex with this guy.
One last thing, if you don’t mind, tell us more about you and him. anything you can think of and don’t mind sharing would be great.
okay i tried to sign in like 23432 times and it wont let me but now i think it’s working. anyway
Profligacy
thanks for your posts…the one with all the quotes made think about this in a whole different way. like more about the conqeunces once i have the baby if i get pregnent. and to answer your question
devon is pretty cool i guess. the first friday he did something with me, saturday he did the same thing to my friend at a bar mitzvah, and sunday he askd me out. and what he did to me wasnt the first time he’s done that with a girl. but he says he’s only said “i love you” to two people, me and someone he actually did love. he doesnt lie, he gets into trouble with is best friend max and a few other people for their immaturity and he’s the bassist of their band. and he’s a boy, he’s always watching porn and jerking off and wanting to do more thngs with me. but probably the only reason why i dun think he’ll break up with me after we have sex (if we have sex) is because he might want to do it again. i dun think he quite understands that i’m a virgin, and it’s gonna hurt and be bloody and crap the first time for me.
me…i dun know. i have good relationships with my friends and people i know…that i like…and i’ve only “cheated” on someone ONCE but that was in 5th grade so it doesnt count cuz the most anyone did was hold hands and a few kissed eachother. yeah. i dun know tell me what you want to know.
i’m really appreciating your posts. it’s really helping me a lot. and i’m telling the truth. serious.
thicktears…i’ll email you. thank you so much. you guys are so great and i dun even know you =)
PiperCharmed1990 [10:56 AM]: we cant have sex yet. i’m just not ready yet. i said i was, but i realize that i’m not ready. i didnt think you were going to actually want to have sex with me, so i didnt really think about it. but we have to wait. i’ll tell you when it’s time, so you’ll know.
i said that to devon just now.
And another reason why I want to have sex with him iss…..REALLY stupid…and it shouldn’t even count as a reason. Yet it does, though a small reason.
I’m sort of in a competition with my friend for who’s gonna score first. It was just created, a few minutes ago. So that’s another reason. At this moment I’m pretty sure I want to have sex with him, but not because of the cometition, though that does have a small part in it. But a VERY small part.
And another reason why I want to have sex with him iss…..REALLY stupid…and it shouldn’t even count as a reason. Yet it does, though a small reason.
I’m sort of in a competition with my friend for who’s gonna score first. It was just created, a few minutes ago. So that’s another reason. At this moment I’m pretty sure I want to have sex with him, but not because of the cometition, though that does have a small part in it. But a VERY small part.
I’m all confused.
DON*T DO IT IF YOU HAVE ANY DOUBTS! I know what you are going threw. My boyfriend and I planned on having sex back in january and we were going to do it in feb. I went over to his house and he was about to put it in but we both stopped and agreed that we wern*t ready. Just please don*t do it if you have doubts….ANY doubts!!!
we are all glad we could help you…well atleast i am
I*m glad…if i did help….I hope… O_o
hope you make the right decision and hope i was of help
Condom, birth control and you shoud be fine i am not telling to do it but if you are going to use protection plenty of kids at my school are not virgins even by bestfriend who is gay he has 3 boyfriends and 2 guys he likes and he has slept with all 3 boyfriends. And Some of the girls at my school arent virgins either they said they used a condom and they are fine
oh my god i sound like my mother (i am 13 also)
by the way … i wouldn’t worry about all the nasty diseases and shit out here. if you blew him you’ve got all his nasty diseases already.
oh yeah … the competition thing is juvenile, stupid and fucked up. grow up.
LOL
that was funny
thanks
Competition can be a big temptation whether you think it’s right or not, try to remember that if you do it to ‘win’ you’ll be far more dissappointed than if you do it because it feels right.
o.O thats a good point
i think i may have to think about this a little longer
seriously, you get diseases from giving head? what kind? and how?…….*scared* O_o
You can get diseases from any exchange of bodily fluid, theres no magic ‘give me a disease’ button that gets pressed by sex…!
…………….*oh*
diseases suck some you gget sexually transmitted dont have cures..
yeah and you people helped me A LOT…THANKS…i like being things BIG…ANYWAY thanks a lot. i really mean it. i dun think i’m going to have sex with him. i think i’ll take a gun to school and shoot everyone. HA wouldnt that be fun? i’m hyper. i need to calm down before i say that to the wrong persona and i get put in an *institution* WOOOOOOT okay anyway thank you all so much i really appreciate it and i dun want to have sex with him and times and at times i do. i know i shouldnt, so i’m not. and i gotta learn to say NO cuz i have a hard time saying that.
sup cryingbloodyknives…don’t do it if u don’t feel right about it. i hate preaching, but when it comes to something like this, i have to throw my two cents in. i don’t want u to get hurt, even though i don’t even kno u. funny how that shit goes… and good for u that u’ve finally made a choice about it…now may i recomend u to come to MY school and shoot all the preps???
heh…
well i havent responded to this in a long time. thanks avalyn.
i dumped him. thanks so much! i’m a lot happier now that he cant do anything to me anymore. i dumped him like a week ago, we’re “friends” more or less but we’re not enemies so it’s all good. you all were a big help…thank you so much…=)) and GUESS WHO’S GOING TO OZZFEST!! I AM i’m so happy anyway byee thanks again
that’s great that ur over that loser…go u!
It’s very good that you got rid of him, but beware, I can promise you that he still wants you He is just Hanging out as a friend until he can gets a chance to swoop in, so you should be very careful around him, there is no telling what he might do. . . . Infact there is not telling what anyone might do. . . so I guess i’m just saying, be very careful.
and remember “False friends are worst than bitter enemies.”
yeah, i should be careful. thats what one of my best friends said to me. he even said dun even tell him in person cuz he might try to rape me or something.
thanks